18 years later and still not over it!
Male - in relationship for 28 years. 18 years ago (10 years into our relationship), my OH confessed to being unfaithful over a period of the preceding 5 years, with multiple partners. We stayed together, had two kids now in their teens. I've never got over it. I managed to conceal my true feelings, hurt, humiliation, inadequacy etc, and deal with it, until recently, but never really got over it. But over recent years I find myself obsessing over it, literally daily, 24/7 it's on my mind. And I can't help ask her questions, scrutinise her accounts of events, and often find implausible her accounts. It's dragging us both down, but I don't now what to do. Concede defeat, accept I'll never get over it, separate and free us both, or what's the alternative? I love my family, my kids in particular, family life looks happy. How do I make us all genuinely happy though?
7 comments posted: Thursday, July 17th, 2025
